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Walker #1: So I think I am going to train for the LA marathon.
Walker #2: Really? What's the cause?
Walker #1: Well, it's for AIDS. Not that I have AIDS, nor know anyone who does.
Walker #2: Yeah, well, we all know AIDS is bad.
--Olympic & La Cienega Park, Los Angeles, California
Little boy #1: It's my turn to use the boogie board! Mom said you have to share!
Little boy #2: Oh yeah? Well, too bad, 'cause I'm not gonna share!
Little boy #1: Oh yeah? Well, I just peed in your wetsuit!
--Long Beach, New York
Perv #1: Dude, check out that girl!
Perv #2: Which one?
Perv #1: Over there, in the yellow suit!
Perv #2: What? She can't be more than twelve!
Perv #1: Dude, I would totally do her!
Perv #2: You need help, man. She doesn't even have tits.
Perv #1: I'm not a titty man.
Perv #2: Yeah, well, your boyfriend in prison will be glad to hear that.
--Island Beach State Park, New Jersey
Guy #1: Eh, to be honest, with as much as I've been laid, I've probably got a kid somewhere.
Guy #2: You need to practice safe sex. Put it in her pooper.
--Pismo Beach, California
Woman: Instead of saying hello, we should say heaveno. Hello gives Satan powers.
--Toronto, Ontario
Girl #1: Why the hell isn't he going? We have to get someplace too!
Girl #2: It's probably a parent.
Girl #1: Yeah, those parents are always looking out for kids' safety. I am so not going to be one of those parents. And I will never have one of those Please Drive Slowly bullshit signs in my yard.
Girl #2: Yeah, if you don't want me to hit your kid, keep him out of the goddamned street.
--Booth Lake, Wisconsin
Little boy, standing in water: I CHALLENGE YOU, POSEIDON!
--Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
Guy #1: Sounds like she really misses you.
Guy #2: Yeah, she does, but what am I supposed to do? If you're not happy, you're not happy. What? Am I supposed to suffer just to make her happy? I'm not Jesus.
--Grand Central
Woman #1: No, they can't do a sequel, it'd get boring. Snakes... in the Sauna!
Woman #2: Yeah, it has to be another animal... and a building.
-- Bathroom, Regal Cinemas, Union Square
Hipster girl #1: I better watch out -- after the weight I lost, my mom is thinking I'm anorexic or something. I should start eating more.
Hipster girl #2: Yeah, or lay off the coke.
Hipster girl #1: Or that.
--Times Square
- ¿Porqué a Fox le apodan el mesero?
- Porque se hizo pato con el cambio.